Here we see two of our Spider Friends, Tom and Sam, putting on their base layer. I will probably never be forgiven for this picture.

And here we see Spider Friend Will’s feelings about his base layer,

…his spider costume,

…and his spider hat.

Honestly, this is what Will thought of 2006, 2007 and much of 2008. But things did eventually get better. We managed one good pic of everyone, but if you look closely you’ll notice the sparkle of fresh tears in each of the Spider Friends’ eyes.

Here we are at our finest Halloween hour, The Year of the Big Bad Wolf and the Three Little Pigs. I think this will always stand out as the ultimate in themed costumes for all four boys. Can’t you just hear Tom saying, “You a pink piggy, Sammy!”

In 2009, Spiderman had grown into this cocky little Fire Chief.

And where’s a fire chief without his band of firemen? Here’s Sam almost ready to go.

Will, complete with fire truck props in the background. You have to appreciate the level of commitment there.

And then there’s Tom, doing…well, only Tom knows for sure.

And this brings us to 2010 — The Year Where Everyone Picks Their Own Costume. Sam and Will are Wolverine and Thomas the Tank Engine respectively. And both have indulged heavily in Mommy’s Vampire Punch — somehow it just tastes better on Halloween than it does every other day of the year (when we call it Fruit Punch).

Tom is Captain America and Jack is a Ghostbuster. And of course, both of them are very scary.

The best part was Tom’s commitment to character. He corrected all and sundry who made the mistake of calling him Tom by pointing to his chest and saying with just the right hint of disdain, “That’s Captain America!”

No wait! Maybe the best part was Jack’s getting a kiss on the cheek from the cutest girl in his kindergarten class. “She loves me,” he informed me. “And I think she likes me, too!”

Or was the best part Will’s permanent Vampire Punch mustache that outlasted his bath and is still holding on this evening?

No, the best part was Sam placidly kicking back on the hay munching candy as Will and Tom scurried from house to house collecting handouts. “Don’t you want to trick or treat anymore, Sam?” I asked.

“No,” he replied around a mouthful of chocolate. “My Will gonna get me canny. I just riding.”

Nice.

I’m with you Sam. Just along for the ride.

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Cutting yourself with your safety scissors? Accident.

Slicing your pants to ribbons? NOT an accident.

Spilling your cereal? Accident.

Pouring your juice in the mess to see the colors run? NOT an accident.

Bumping into your brother? Accident.

Biting the #@$% out of him? Again, NOT an accident.

Glad we could clear this up.

No…what I’m really here for this morning is to tell you how absolutely, indisputably, freaking cute I look today. And I know that sounds horrible, but it’s been a long time coming so let me revel in it. Basically, I let up on the whole “no buying clothes that fit, just lose 15 lbs.” rule. And it was kind of like where you ban sugar from your diet then freak out and eat an entire pie.

Last Saturday, I hit Ann Taylor Loft like the Vikings hit northern England. I’m not kidding, there was some serious 9th century pillaging happening. I found pants that fit in a size that doesn’t wound my pride (thank you vanity sizing!). And tons of cute tops that skim over the problem areas without veering into the maternity top look. A much harder trick to pull off than you might think. In fact, I look an awful lot like this right now — only, you know…older and shorter and…well I’m wearing this top, at least.

Also cardigans. I’m in a cardigan phase right now, and they fed the urge admirably. Check out this one with the sparkles. Own it! And am wearing it with the aforementioned top and my new boyfriend crop jeans. Comfy and fabulous. Cannot beat it.

O.k. — so that’s my ME moment. Now I have to go take the boys to pre-school. To any of my local peeps, I’ve got tons of coupons that they gave me for next month’s big sale. As I won’t be able to shop again for the next six months (at least), I’ll happily pass these along so you can enjoy your own Viking moment. Only, don’t light anything on fire. They get really weird about that.

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But honestly, who wants to dress up like an investment banker?

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*How I define being “Goal-Oriented.”

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Me, standing in my closet staring at my clothes: Just trying to decide what to wear today, babe.

Tom: Ummm…Dinosaurs.

Now why didn’t I think of that?

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Tom is what you might call solid. Thick as a tree, strong as an ox — I’m convinced Tom is going to hit his 4 year growth spurt and then decide between completing pre-school or declaring himself NFL draft eligible. But in the meantime, he needs pants.

I searched GAP, local department stores, J.C. Penney and finally, after much soul searching turned to Sears. Why the hesitation? Two words — Pretty Plus.

Pretty Plus is a code word they use for a special segment of the girl’s clothing line at Sears, and I’ll clue you in now — it doesn’t mean MORE pretty. It means MORE to love…MORE material required…MORE trips to the buffet line. In short, it’s the clothes for big girls, and it’s the only place I could find pants until the 6th grade.

So for me, a return to Sears shopping meant revisiting a LOT of childhood trauma. I worried that giving Tom the “Husky” label (the code word for the boys’ clothing line) at such an early age might be hurtful. I worried that he would notice that his clothes were different than his brothers’. In short, I worried that I was placing the weight of all my childhood angst squarely on his sturdy little shoulders. It was a lot to swallow, but I took a deep breath and clicked through the checkout screens required to place my order. Then put it out of my mind.

But as the days went by, and Tom had to wear sweatpants or elastic shorts while the other boys were wearing jeans, I really began to look forward to that Sears order. So what if he’s built a little differently? He still deserves to be comfortable! I started to get a bit angry with all those other retailers for not realizing that awesome comes in all shapes and sizes. And three years old is way too young to be told that you don’t “fit the mold.” Come to think of it…I’m not sure it’s ever o.k. to send that message.

The box arrived last night. And after his bath, when he was smelling his sweetest and feeling his cuddliest, Tommy got to try on his new pants. Pants with enough room in the waist so his tummy doesn’t hurt. Pants built for a boy born with a booty, so he can run and jump and play without constantly having to stop and tug them back into place. In short, pants that made him feel good. He patted his new jeans and said with a huge grin, “Mommy, dese fit me jus’ wight.”

And suddenly, I remembered the beautiful eggplant corduroys I got in the 4th grade. They came with a matching Lavender turtleneck covered in flowers. I remembered how soft they were when I slipped them on. How I felt like smiling more when I was wearing them. And in that moment, just like flipping a switch, I decided Pretty Plus just might have stood for “More Pretty” after all.

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Now, here’s the shallowest. My fancy shmancy new red shoes. I’ve only wanted a pair of red shoes since I saw The Wizard of Oz for the first time many, many years ago. And now, I can finally click my heels together with authority. The best part — they had a leopard print sister pair that they just couldn’t leave the store without. And who was I to break up a family?

There's No Place Like Home

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“Guess what, boys? You get to wear your new long-sleeved shirts today!”

A happy chorus went up. Ever since the mail order arrived last week, Will’s been bugging me to wear his choo choo shirt, Jack’s begged to wear his dinosaur shirt and Tom has asked about his “green one” — which I picked because of his obsessive love of ALL things green. Sam wasn’t all that interested. Despite the fact that he looks like a young model for Abercrombie and Fitch, he’s only interested in clothes sporting Lightning McQueen, Mickey Mouse, or pretty much any other Disney creation. As his new shirt had an appliqued sailboat, he was only marginally interested in the proceedings.

But as for me, I. Am. Stoked. I’ve always loved Fall. It’s my very favorite time of year. I love the way the whole world is gilded by a newly slanted sun. I love the crisp bite of the morning air and the crunch of leaves underfoot. I love new clothes and fresh school supplies. The pleasure of hot soup and crusty bread. It’s all I can do not to hug myself, I’m so happy today.

I’ve just been ordered to go get dressed myself. Jack doesn’t want to be late and miss out on getting to show off his vicious T-Rex shirt to all his friends before school.

Wishing everyone a day as wonderful as this one has begun for me!

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Bullies Confronted by Pink Power « SHADMIA’S WORLD.

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