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Breakfast of Champions

I stand, leaning on the sink for support, watching the sun as it peeks over the tree line. At least they let me sleep past dawn today. I try to be thankful and not reminisce about sleeping until 8 a.m. or later. A war whoop sounds behind me followed by, “Sticky FEET!!” Without turning around I growl, “STOP climbing on my CABINETS!”

“Awwww!” Jack whines in disappointment. I smile to myself. The whole “eyes in the back of your head” thing really is coming in handy.

With sigh, I turn from the sink, clap my hands and say, “O.k.! Everybody bring me your cups for pink milk!” Sam and Tom sprint to the living room and back then proudly place their cups on the counter. Orange for Sam. Blue for Tom.

“I’m gonna need a new cup, mom,” says Jack.

“Not a problem. Will! Where is your cup?”

“I not know!”

“Well find your cup or no drink.”

“I can’t fine it Mommy. You fine it.”

I don’t have it in me to conduct a full-scale search for the missing green cup, so I give up and head to the cabinet to get new cups for both him and Jack. I line them up on the counter and begin mixing Nestle Strawberry Quick assembly line style.

“There my cup!” Will shouts triumphantly, pointing at the new green one I just pulled from the cabinet. “I see it, Mommy! Dere it is!”

“Thanks, babe. You’re a huge help.”

“I want Appie Juice,’ he says, just as I screw the lid on the last cup.

Sam hears him and picks up the chant. “I want Appie Juice, too!”

I’ve fought this fight before, and decide it’s not worth a revisit this morning. I dump the milk down the drain and pour them juice.

Finally, they are all settled around the kitchen table. Bowls of Cheerios? Check. Drinks? Check. Now I can think about my own breakfast.

Sam takes one sip of his apple juice, plops it back on the table and shouts, “Mom! I want pink milk!”

It’s going to be a very long day.

Posted in Family & Relationships, Kids, Parenting, Uncategorized.

4 Responses

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  1. B says

    Do you ever feel like you live Murphy’s Law? This exact scenario happens almost every morning with Max and his choice for breakfast. I think I could feed a third world country with his discards………

  2. bells says


    There. I feel better.

  3. jodi says

    Seriously, Bells! That’s the only thing I could think to say too! 😉

  4. jodi says

    That’s what I think, B!!! And for the longest, I held out against just dumping stuff out so they’d learn not to be wasteful. But some days I just don’t want to hear any more screaming. 🙂

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